It is the pain

If at all it means so much to you
You try too hard to show
I mean nothing at all
Stay afar stay aloof
Don't reach out at all
I am fine being a forgotten part
Why to draw a ray of hope
And escape like the darkness in the cloud
I’ll never say how u hurt me
I won’t even hint, u hurt me at all
I walk with a desire  within my heart
I want to be your end I want u to start
I’ll not shout it aloud nor will I shy away
You could have chosen to stay, u chose to walk away
I’ll not plead I’ll never pretend
It’s not the fear it is the pain

feelings are brave

Often I find myself dreaming of this episode that could have been a beautiful memory, that might had brought tears and a realization of this pain, could it have built enough strength to love beyond the usual.

When I lie and walk when I close and watch, when I shower and when I eat when I fall sick and I speed, I think of u without trying to think of u. like the gulp of air that I don’t have to try, I need it I need u to survive.

Every day I trick my heart and make believe, we are better off like this, coz a promise had to be kept and distance had to be made, because that’s what doing what the heart wants is being impulsive, and we love the tag of being fair, no matter how badly it screws.

Being a slight different terrifies. The opinion terrifies. Being a shadow in the dark feels safe, being the lone sun terrifies.

Feelings are brave it’s the mind that shits the pant

I love you enough

To take away every sigh of your silence

And chuck all the gravels that comes in your way

To walk you through the obsessed

And build a roof when you want to rest

Unearth divinity for you to pray  

I love you enough to create things your way

Never let a single tear escape your eye

I’ll hold it up, help you survive

Give my hand for you to sleep on

While I feel accomplished

Able to watch harmony in your eye

To show you the beauty of love

How to smile at the silliest

And Laugh harder, when it’s tough

Go ahead and create the mess

I got your back,

I’ll walk along and find a way

While we figure out the consequences

I’ll help you clean it all away

No matter how things ever turn out to be

And you feel hesitant to reach out 

I’ll hear you whisper, and I’ll arrive  

Not an hour, neither a person means more to me

its a funny world

Gradually I have reached to the stage where giving back seems a child’s play

A petty habit accepted and cherished so profoundly

One in every other person doesn’t have the clear concise

You thought they have or so wanted to be

The inclination towards complexity is like never before

Braggers of achievement over one’s mind are making rounds

While Simplicity is taking a back seat

But as they say it’s the survival of the fittest

Being observant and proactive will help you survive

There is no compulsion to be one of many

The need of the hour is to be cautious enough

To not consider the one who claim to be wise

When you fight all day long

You don’t want to come home to a battle field

Keep updating the list of the dear folks

You never know which one out here

Isn’t thinking least fair for you

It’s a funny world of ours

Sometimes we think we are the lion

And at times we are content being a joker

I am gonna get over you

It’s harder than I thought

But slowly I am learning to live without you

There are moments when I want to reach out

And moments I want to forget all the pain I went through

It might take a day a year or two

But I am gonna get over you

I don’t expect you to be there for me

Nor I feel to talk you my problems

You say I am important but I have never felt that way

You have a world around your head

And people you choose to show you care

With me you are scared to give me hope

And I am scared to hope a little more

The fear has seeped in too deep

No charm has left to recall

Some hopeless scenarios the heart wants so true

Are the webs blocking the light and I can’t see through

I wanna live with people who never left

And you my dear are an unavailable friend

Smooth or bumpy I will take this ride without you

And before I even realize it

I am gonna get over you.

Dont want you around

I don’t want you in my mind or my heart

I want you all erased from my memory

Be smudged in the past

Not even your silence to bother me

No anticipation with your sound

I want nothing to do with you

I don’t want you around

You live somewhere happy

and i am not even a distant reason for it

I just wish to wipe u out of my head

Not think of you for a single sec

Ur thoughts bother me

And I keep playing the stories

Imagining how things can ever be

It’s not gonna happen anyway

It’s just taking too much away

I believe the day will come

Sooner than I wish, sooner than it will

We can’t be friends anymore

The awkwardness will always stay

So we are better off as foreigner

not pass by, don't even meet half way

I am the beauty I am the beast

There are times I feel I can run a mile

Or sit and brood for eternity

A constant battle that goes on inside

 I feel the guilt of the pain I cause

And held back from the love I feel so much

All the anger I keep inside and try to resist

Still I loose and show the beast

Stay silent for hours together

And search someone who seems worthy enough

Coz I will not judge with what u speak of yourself

It’s what u made me feel, how much I felt at ease

I ll prefer not much of an human

But the untamed animal you are

Coz every individual I come across

My faith in humanity dissipate a little

I run along the unknown and the unloved

The danger with them seems the least

Never fall for the smile, there is too much unseen

With greater closeness the obvious is revealed

I am the beauty, I am the beast

when i watch you smile

When I watch u smile

It gives me peace

It gives me strength

When I hold ur hand

I can walk a mile

The cute dimple of yours

That appears on ur cheek

I feel alive so alive

When u do not talk

And I see you sad

U distance yourself

So no one can see

How every single thing

Affects you awhile

It crumbles my heart

When I see through you

Not a single things seems worthwhile

When u call me names

And make fun of me

I feel glad

When I watch u smile

U deserve so much

Abundance of love and care

I can turn things upside down

Can build sand castles

Even clean ur house

I can do all, I can do more

When I watch u smile

Hold it together

Some stay for a while

Some stay for longer

Some pain prolongs

And  makes us stronger

It's all in the moment

Not all that gone by

We live to create memories

That stays by forever

Trust with all ur heart

And love with all ur soul

U were born in a world

So filled with humans

It's OK to be the crowd

 Be a part, be a member

It’s not the dream

That takes years to fulfill

It’s now or never

It's there in the eye

That shine with ur smile

It's by ur side

emrace it tighter

Hold it all together.

a lil wish

A lil wish of me

To be with u and be me

Sit on the stairs for hours

while those talks we do

The way I could never get

Enough of you

Asvwe take a walk down the street

You hold my hand like always

And we get back to the place we call home

You wash the dishes

And I help u cook a thing or two

Is it too much to ask

Is it too much to greed

With so much chaos downing me

I want to sleep in your arms

And be a sweet child

I use to be.

wo jo adhura reh gaya

Wo waqt jise pana tha

Wo waqt kabka guzar gaya

Mere hath ke lakiro mein

Tu bita hua kal reh gaya

Mai gira bhi aur sambhla bhi

Tujhe bhulkar, yaad aaya bhi

Kitab ke panno me jaise

Mai banke syahi bikhar gaya

Wo pal jo tera aur mera tha

haathon se yuhin fisal gaya

Mai dhundata raha andhero me

Mera ujala koi aur le gaya

Mai darr kar chipa to nahin tha

Par teri  talash ka

Mai kabhi hissa nahi tha

suni thi teri khaniyan maine

tere sath k lamhe bhi dauraye the

kuch dhundla sa yaad aata hai kabhi

wo kissa jo shayad adhura reh gaya

walk away

With you I head somewhere

A place so unknown and unfamiliar

A door I left shut and locked for years

Is leading me its way

It’s not the place I want to be

You left me there and ran way

I want to shout and

Question you at times

What you thought

What made you play?

The little sadist in me

Wants you to undergo the pain

The same longingness

That never gets away

But it’s not your fault

It was never your choice

A spur of moment

And things headed its way

An unprocessed happening

Will not define, our life forever

I close the door

That leads u to me

This is the time

I am thinking of myself

And I am happy

To walk away

as beautiful as love

A day of love

A day for u and me

With all those unsaid emotions

The moments that meant to be

Never actually happened

Coz we kept it inside

What ought to be free

Will u sing my favorite song?

And cook me, my favorite dish

Did I ever ask u to do that for me?

No I didn't, I just let it be

Was I shy or was I too scared

Too much pent up emotions

That lingers inside of me

I don’t wanna live a life of regret

It’s too hard that way

Let me speak my heart my love

I love you

Its OK if u don’t feel that way

But if you do, say it out loud

Let’s not refrain ourselves

From an emotion

As beautiful as love

its Me

Yet another day is over

Yet another to begin

What’s there to pretend?

And the fight to fit in

I am on my own

A soul born for me

Not for the masses

Not for the crowd

It’s just me after all

Not flawless

Rather full of faults

 I’ll make mistake

And I’ll laugh over it

I’m gonna cry out

And I’m gonna lead

I am a risk taker

I am the trouble maker

I am loud and lousy

Yet I shy at times

I don’t act pricy

I am cool like a dude

That’s me and that’s my identity

teri meri kahaani hai

Khamosh hi rehne do

ye shor saare bemani hai

Koi kissa adhura sa

Meri aankhon ka paani hai

Ye mushkilein saari

Kabhi tere hisse

Kabhi mere hisse aani hai

Zindagi aur kuch bhi nahi

Teri meri kahaani hai

I was Broken, all most shattered

I was broken, all most shattered

And I was fine being in the shell

I was a hard head i still am

I fell, wiped the dust n walked off

I could never show the need

To be loved and be surrounded by it

I showed off my strength and

It made me believe indeed i am

U saw through the cracks

U held me when i fought those tears

I hurt u a lot

I loved u but held back

I was scared to loose u

And to let u go

So i gave u enough reason

To give up on me

But u didn't, u stayed

I love u baby

Be mine now and forever.

I am almost there

I am almost there

Not there at all

Don’t you come near me

I might break

It took a lot to stay away

And convince myself

That’s what best for you and me

And then I hear your voice

And I see myself wanting you again

Should I continue like that?

Nor talk to u neither talk about u

Yes I want to see you

And be near you

But I can’t fall gain

And watch myself fall apart

U know I hate being weak

How much can I smile?

When all I feel is pain

I am almost there

Not there at all

A few more days

A few more years

Might take my mind off you

I keep reminding myself

No matter how much I love

It isn't meant for you

Some place some time

When I am strong enough

U will see my face

When I’ll be over you

Till then I am gonna be

 Some one some how

some where u knew.

kya laaye the

Kuch laaye the Jo kuch le jaoge

Sirf yaadein apni tum chhod jaoge

Wo khwab adhure se

Wo hansi bemaani si

Naam k wo rishte saare

Kyun bojh inke utaoge

Koshishen saari mukammal nai hoti

Khud se kar ummeed intehaan

Khud se hi door hojaoge

Kya hua agar haar jaoge

Zara door chaloge, to thak jaoge

Zindagi bahut lambi bhi nahi

Kitna ruthoge kis kis ko manaoge

Jeebhar jeeyo har pal Jo jeeyo

Dil se jeeyoge

To dil se yaad aaoge.